[ he remembers what she had mentioned during trial, even though it got eclipsed by literally everything that happened after. she's something like a goddess? he isn't sure. ]
[ She sighs. How does she want to explain this, if at all? ]
Where I'm from, certain spirits are recorded in a place out of space and out of time. They can be summoned by magic. When they're summoned, it's like a new life each time. Sometimes, you can have memories of previous times you've been summoned, and other times, you can't.
[ like different versions of the same person? he tries to imagine what it's like that one day there might be another you out there who doesn't remember anything that you did.
it gives him a pause when he doesn't entirely hate the idea. ]
So, if something happened to you... you could come back, but it might not be you anymore?
If I die, I still die. Being summoned again... I won't be the same existence. What previously made me able to be here would be gone. Every new summoning is... like a spiritual clone.
[ Reincarnation isn't completely wrong, but it's also not quite right either.
Three's no perfect metaphor or analogy she can make, nothing she thinks is good enough to give to him. It's odd enough that she cares enough to want to tell him, but... ]
[ he can't say he gets it entirely, but... he might understand the gist of it, at least.
considering how proud she is, and how she had said she just wants to be herself, meltryllis might not be too happy about something like that, he thinks. ]
Well... I guess we'll have to make sure you don't die then.
[ here, anyway. there's not much he can do after they escape. ]
[ She's fine with it. She shouldn't have been able to be summoned again, if not for someone's cheating. She saw and experienced happiness once, and it was enough. It was more than enough.
His words makes her expression soften. ]
... You're strange.
[ There's no bite to that. There's no edge to it at all. ]
[ ... it reminds him of someone, and he tries to shake that thought away. ]
I'll try my best.
[ trust is something that can be easily broken over reasons someone might not think is a big deal. so he can't promise he might never do something she'd hate, but ]
And I'll do everything I can to make sure we both get out of here.
[ it's not a promise of something definite, but it's more than he can give to someone else. ]
[ She opens her mouth, as if to try to say something, but nothing comes out. Her hands are covered by her too long sleeves, but they clench into fists.
[ he has never actually had to explain this to anyone so he is
trying to figure out how ]
Basically... one day, this kid and I accidentally pissed of a kappa, and he made it so that we can turn into kappa, too. And we were helping him to collect these things called Dishes of Hope. If we collected five of them, we'd get a wish granted.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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Asch isn't the only who's been dead before.
[ Of course she wants to live. She's not suicidal. She wants to dance to her heart's content at all times, but
well, a Servant isn't meant to be around forever. ]
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... was that before or after you got powers?
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[ She was made that way. There was no ascension to godhood. ]
But it doesn't really matter.
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[ he's not sure if he can even ask this, and what's too off limits ]
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It's weird, feeling like she might want someone to understand. It's not usual for her. ]
How I was born, how I come into existence— it's different from you humans. When I die... if I die, in special circumstances, I can be called again.
[ It won't be the same her, though. She won't be the same person anymore. ]
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instead he just takes the information in. ]
Like... reincarnation or something?
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No, it's not quite that.
[ ... ]
Are you sure you want to understand?
[ She's not used to humans wanting to understand her. ]
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[ that's honest, at least. toi tries to avoid anything he doesn't care about. ]
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Where I'm from, certain spirits are recorded in a place out of space and out of time. They can be summoned by magic. When they're summoned, it's like a new life each time. Sometimes, you can have memories of previous times you've been summoned, and other times, you can't.
[ It just depends. ]
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it gives him a pause when he doesn't entirely hate the idea. ]
So, if something happened to you... you could come back, but it might not be you anymore?
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If I die, I still die. Being summoned again... I won't be the same existence. What previously made me able to be here would be gone. Every new summoning is... like a spiritual clone.
[ Reincarnation isn't completely wrong, but it's also not quite right either.
Three's no perfect metaphor or analogy she can make, nothing she thinks is good enough to give to him. It's odd enough that she cares enough to want to tell him, but... ]
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considering how proud she is, and how she had said she just wants to be herself, meltryllis might not be too happy about something like that, he thinks. ]
Well... I guess we'll have to make sure you don't die then.
[ here, anyway. there's not much he can do after they escape. ]
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His words makes her expression soften. ]
... You're strange.
[ There's no bite to that. There's no edge to it at all. ]
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[ missile is like
right there ]
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[ She sighs and looks away. ]
I find it harder and harder to distrust you.
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I'll try my best.
[ trust is something that can be easily broken over reasons someone might not think is a big deal. so he can't promise he might never do something she'd hate, but ]
And I'll do everything I can to make sure we both get out of here.
[ it's not a promise of something definite, but it's more than he can give to someone else. ]
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She still can't look at him. ]
... For a human, you're not terrible.
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... thanks.
[ he can't get offended on humanity's behalf since, honestly, he thinks they're all pretty terrible. ]
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Meltryllis is terrible in her own right, too, but tonight, she doesn't want to fully be. ]
Your profile says you're a kappa.
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[ it does say that ]
Uh. Not right now.
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[ what does that mean
give me the sarazanmai lore ]
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[ he has never actually had to explain this to anyone so he is
trying to figure out how ]
Basically... one day, this kid and I accidentally pissed of a kappa, and he made it so that we can turn into kappa, too. And we were helping him to collect these things called Dishes of Hope. If we collected five of them, we'd get a wish granted.
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[ Unfortunately or maybe fortunately for Toi, Fate/ is full of stupid bullshit.
So she believes him easily and doesn't think any of it as strange. ]
What was your wish?
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My wish... to help my brother.
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Are you close to collecting five?
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